fear

As a boy I was scared a lot of things, it didn’t matter what but anything that had to deal with the possibility of death it would get under my skin and I would panic and freak out. This happened with swimming, and especially heights.

As a kid I was an easy target because other kids could see and target me. The teenage, and adult life are no different. People have this inclination and desire to provoke, poke and prod until you satisfy their torment. In the best case scenario, they are interested in your growth and your maturity, but in other cases they just want to be an asshole.

See swimming in deep water I could never for the life me, figure out, and I avoided it like the plague. Now swimming in deep water is no big deal, and I do it with ease. I’ll admit even swimming out in lakes and larges waters does creep me out, because you do not know what could swimming in those waters with you. Or maybe you are swimming in area of where somebody died and the body was never discovered, there is really no telling honestly.

On this topic alone it reminds me of the Mackinac bridge here in Michigan, and even the bridge bordering over into Canada… and the underground tunnel that travels to and from Canada. Our civilization here has many different obstacles and sights that attract and draw and attention. But when you consider the lives lost and injured in the process of creating and making this remarkable things, it really gives weight into more appreciation.

So back to fear, if you want to overcome something it is only through the process of doing. You must travel the distance to achieve the necessary goal or achievement. Why do you feel worried or scared? well what is it that you desire? if you intent is selfish or greed, or even to please your sexual appetite, than by no means will the good Lord encourage and hand you over to calamity and sin. See this is where I think Christians and unbelievers begin to struggle and stagger. They look at benefit of others who achieve and get high praise all the while they are obviously not living upright.

Its none of your business! and its none of mine. My business is doing God’s will and living the best life I can, for myself and my family.

Death and life are in the power of the tongue, And those who love it will eat its fruit. -Proverbs 18:21

When we talk badly of somebody we are accusing them to death, whether we want to believe it or not. There are individuals on this earth who think terribly of me, even to the point of wanting to kill me. I cannot help that, its in their heart and they have that burden and desire inside themselves. I can’t name anyone specifically, and I hope I never have to. But the possibility is always there.

Gossiping and outright slandering a person to a point of humiliation begins to create a bad spirit and atmosphere. This is spiritual and is not something atheists, agnostics or Hindu’s and any other religion can contend with. It is the Christian doctrine and the person of Christ that is the remedy and solution to the pains of guilt and shame.

If you have same sex with a person, its not that you’re a bad person, its that you’re trying to get something that was never intended for you to have. Sex is between a man and woman. The key fits into the lock and it unlocks the treasure, so is to the magic and beauty of sex.

But please consider that sex is a beautiful and sacred act and practice. It is not fornicating till dusk to dawn and getting your rocks off at every given moment, it’s meant as a gift and communion and bond between two partners and most of all God.

Trusting in God and having faith in self and your own abilities is a long and hard process it doesn’t happen instantaneously it takes lots of work. When I entered into the guiding light mission, I was big into weight lifting, but running was definitely not something I was interested in. I was intimidated and scared to start. But we as a group went and ran around the city and we did it little by little, and the we had gradual success.

This was the buildup to me running in a 5k marathon in grand rapids. I put on my music, and I laid my head low, and I consistently ran it to the end. And nobody was there to pat me on the back, or greet me, or to say congratulations. So I saw all the waters and banana’s at the end as a treat, but I hadn’t got any recognition so I high tailed out of there so fast and got back to business as usual.

Its nobody’s responsibility to make you feel good about yourself, it is the Lord who is working in and through you who will help you achieve and do anything you want or desire. That experience to me, felt like a failure, but much later in my life, now I realize it was indeed a victory. Because I did get out there, and I ran the race and I did my part, and accomplished the goal.

Our achievements and success are not reliant on man and women, our success is with the Lord God in heaven. Everywhere you turn and look, there is the center stage person and the key figure of the majority. But there are equal people that exist and are striving right along to achieve and accomplish the same task and goal.

Does death scare me? no, because I know without a shadow of a doubt that when I die, I will be meeting my maker, and He is Jesus Christ my lord above. I cannot live in this world timid and fearful, I need to be bold and confident. But my confidence is from the Lord above. And that is not by my strength, but the Lord above.

Life is a confusing mystery, but you cannot know for certain the thoughts of another individual. You can smirk, grimace and smile and try to get their attention, but unless you actually step out and speak to a person and say, “Hello how are you?”

About Trevor Markiv 451 Articles
wandering the cosomos trying to blast galaxies and find the stars.

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