the 2026 metalhead starter kit

I DO NOT KNOW THESE PEOPLE. YES I AM JUDGING THEM BASED ON THEIR APPEARANCES AND HOW THEY CONDUCT THEMSELVES ONLINE.

THAT BEING SAID, I AM NOT BETTER THAN THEM. IN FACT THEY COULD BE OVERALL BETTER PEOPLE THAN ME, I HAVE NO IDEA HONESTLY.

THIS ISN’T A WITCH HUNT. ITS A SATIRE PIECE. I DO WANT THE INDIVIDUALS SHOWN TO BE SAVED AND COME TO A KNOWLEDGE OF CHRIST/GOD and KNOW HOW TO COMMUNICATE WITH GOD.

SEE IVE BEEN CHASING THE DOLLAR JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE, TRYING TO MAKE A NAME. AND IT COMES UP VOID. MY TREASURES ARE IN HEAVEN, THIS ROCK IS NOT MY HOME.

and by all means feel free and rope together a hit piece on me, I am always eager to see what others do think about me, whether good or bad.

With an upsurgence in homosexuals and trans people, I figured it was time to help those who are interested in the devils favorite genre of music, to pay attention and settle down with what the internet has done not so gracefully for us.

I stumbled on this dumpster fire of a channel earlier today when they dressed themselves up in fake blood and made a rant about white nationalist black metal. Which by the way, its a free country and people are entitled to their own beliefs.

and no, WHITE – BLACK – YELLOW – BROWN etc etc we are all under the judgment seat of christ. And the core commandment is to love your brother, as you love yourself. Obviously by nature of this piece, I still have a lot of work to do in that department. But I am starting to see, that the more I try and impress God and less man, the better. But ultimately, humility, meekness are the core things you will want to pay the attention to. Helping and serving, instead of using and abusing.

Odd to me how lgbtq is literally the most anti-human and blasphemous group currently in america. And its defended and support 100% by the usa.

White nationalism and racism period is not only wrong, but is ACTUALLY hateful! unlike a conscious decision to be a pervert and degenerate.

But that is neither the point or the purpose of this article. See this is specifically about how to become a metalhead in 2026.

WHO ARE THE METALHEADS of the 2020s?

OBSERVATION A: intellectual douche bag (freedom is available, and if serious, I will happily remove this negativity and even pray and help the man find resources and help available to him, and every one else mentioned here for that matter)

Its not necessarily who, but more of a what is a metalhead of the 2020s. See while I was trying to protect my ass hole from degenerate homosexuals, and preserve my status as a male. I started to notice something while I was into this horse shit music. I was actually not helping the world, I was hurting it.

See I thought being a pseudo intellectual, and a anus for satan to shove his devil horns into. Was helping the planet, turns out it wasn’t. And the one thing about satan, is the rascal is never content on this life here. He is only happy when humans are dead.

Anyways, I’ll try and avoid the spirituality or, “religion” as the internet so aptly calls it. I know I am breaking two big rules here, politics and religion. Two things everyone on the internet is obsessed with, but if you fail to meet their standards of the two, then of course they are quick to pull out the 2 priority rules.

I digress. Lets dig into properly analyzing and examining what and who a metal head is today. For the uninitiated and otherwise, pampered and well groomed kids, the fella above is probably the category you will fit into best. Not everything mentioned in that photo is necessary, but at the very least the tattoos and a nose ring are a nice touch.

OBSERVATION B: GYM DONKEY TOUGH GUY

Who can forget this specimen? he has has cookie cutter knee wraps on, and is probably studying his body like some kind of lethal enforcer for the pits of hell.

Nothing too unique about this individual. Hypocrisy and contradictions but most importantly above all else gym gains is the name of the game. Yes every muscle must be tight. So that you can try and intimidate and make lesser physically equipped individuals intimidated or scared. Its actually one of the oldest tricks in the book, and I do pray God equips and shows the possibly weaker individuals how to handle the situation.

But in this case if you are actually trying to be like this guy. You are going to want have a healthy diet of narcissism, ego and pride. Pride in what? I do not know. Because if your chasing a perfect body in 2026 you have more competition than anything else I am aware of.

This scum fuck had the nerve to complain that the gym parking lot was empty on CHRISTmas day. Give me a break! he cannot let himself relax and God forbid go spend time with his family and friends, for one day!? he doesn’t even have to give credit to Jesus. He could tangle it up in ol’ satan clause for all I care.

I am sure there is more observations and other stereotypes. But honestly, I am done. Done with metal? no, not a chance! I am actually trying to get my vocal chords trained up, so I can go and be in a band myself. I would love to get out and tour and share myself with the world. But of all, preach and proclaim the good news, of Christ death, burial and resurrection.

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