dis mfuka mut b onnn suM drgs

dis mfuka mut b onnn suM drgs

streaming is fun and it is a “community” but it’s all monetized and incentivized around money. It ruins the fun and the grain and fabric of authenticity in place of greed and status. It’s the catastrophic dichotomy of the internet. And entertainment in general. It’s no fault, in anybody and there is no point in finger pointing but it does trivialize and cause me concern to think about this, because while yes, I do enjoy my hobbies and extracurricular activities, but I am perplexed to think that maybe I need to meditate and think about what God has in opportunity for me? because I by myself am swirling in confusion. And not mention the constant schizoid voices and/or demons and are infecting my brain daily, its intolerable to deal with a lot of things placed in front of me. I do want to put more effort and devotion into building this page into something better, but I cannot benial authenticity. 1st world problems, demand first world solutions… and that might be to get all sloshed or meddle my face in a batter of misery. But no there is hope and there is a path that leads and absolves doubt fear and depression and that is in the convincing and comfortable scriptures of our father God in heaven who has gifted us with the bible, so read it and meditate on it like a great piece of food or savory delicacy.

I am sorry to my fans of apathy and depression, and otherwise self-loathing and determinantal mental gymnastics aside. I am laid distressed at this pedigree of life choices I’m faced with. It’s with privilege and duty that I am offered a life to breathe and exist so that I might share this with you, and I hope in good mood.

My psychology and thinking are getting better, but there is still this disconnect between reality and the spiritual. And or if government conspiracy paranoia is present. It never ends and I may die having this mystery in my mind.

Conversations with self

chinese assisting russia

signing death papers

I don’t think that there is an end to suffering. In fact, I believe that people have this inescapable dilemma inside themselves where they think that traumas and suffering have an escape. The only escape from suffering is from a absolute and a directive. Until they reflect and understand that they have suffering it won’t relinquish. It will continue to fester and antagonize. I wish I would encourage a release. Perhaps even driving this insect out of its hiding. Who is scared?

I do indeed love to see fear. I love to watch fear and it makes me feel superior. Because from the beginning I’ve always wanted to feel superior. And now I do indeed know that I am actually inferior. Because I have no idea of the pain that I will endure.

And yes, I do feel superior. I feel indeed a response to even pleasure. My god I have become a monster!!! a monster? no not yet. We haven’t watched this subject be turned into the shit that he wants. There is no determination.


I think he thinks that I care.

Imagine a human being who thrives off of suffering.

They do not understand that there is a cosmological and intrinsic source that does not exist in this human realm. Indeed, this being does exist to see that justice is served.

Follow by Email
%d bloggers like this: