my issue with schizophrenia and mental illness

my issue with schizophrenia and mental illness

I am going to make myself vulnerable and discuss and speak about something that has personally affected me for a long time but have never publicly spoken about it. This is not a joke and something I make light of for sympathy or any other ulterior motive. I simply want freedom from this and get back a sense of myself and true identity.

I hear audible voices/hallucinations, they come and go. It happens daily, whether home or out and about. It doesn’t matter what I am doing, they are always around. I’ve been having these kinds of episodes for over 2 decades now I am almost 40 years old. I’ve had a theory that at some point in my life somebody planted surveillance technology in my body, but I am not sure.

I am aware that drugs/alcohol do have symptoms of paranoia hallucinations from withdrawal. But I do not have an addiction to anything.

These voices are too specific and conscious, like a real living person. They respond to my thoughts and consciousness. Whether I say something with my mind they can hear and repeat whatever I think. And sometimes they just speak without reason.

I do take medication, but I am currently on a new medication that I’ve only been using for a short time. I speak to a psychiatrist and get mental health treatment. I may need deliverance from demonic possession, but this is something I’ve dealt with for over 2 decades now.

leaky gut, lectin and prebiotics?

I randomly saw this ad and didn’t think much of it, but out of curiosity I watched it to the end and I am actually feeling kind of down on myself because I am in the group of people who assumed whole wheat and grains was a good part of diet, and was unaware of the damage of lectin’s in the intestinal walls of the gut. But this actually makes a whole lot of sense, because I do feel a lot of gassiness and bloating from my diet of high grains and nuts. So I’ve actually been doing myself quite a bit of harm, in the theory that I was actually doing myself some good. Its actually a very entertaining and enlightening video, if you have the time to watch it. But in summary he is trying to sell his vitamin Bio Complete 3. Its about $50 a bottle, and Im hard pressed for the cash, but I wish I had the money because I wanna start this stuff right now. This video covers a lot he dives into the diets of other countries and cultures and he details the benefits and longevity of said people. I had no idea the detrimental affect of chapstick and antacid pills. Im sure a lot of people are skeptical, but if that’s you, I’d seriously encourage you to watch the video. This might help give you an extra 10-20 years to your life span.

Now I am both excited and encouraged to find these discoveries from Dr. Gundry, it’s going to me some time to afford a bottle, but I do intend on purchasing it very soon and trying it out. Hope this might be of some help to anyone reading.

Starvation, pain and support


what kind of unit of weight unit does Ukraine use to measure the amount of body weight a human has?

Я припускаю, що в моєму найсильнішому стані я мав 260 фунтів. Моя поточна маса тіла становить приблизно 140 фунтів. Отже, я втратив досить значну кількість ваги. У мене ніколи не було наміру опускатися до такої ваги, але життя, стрес і багато інших факторів зіграли тут роль.

Гадаю, це само собою зрозуміло, що в Україні фашистський диктатор Сталін змусив голодувати кількох людей. Зараз це загальновідомо і називають «Голодомором».

Я не обов’язково хочу зважувати цю вагу, але в моїх теоріях, які враховують масу тіла та щільність гравітації, це змушує мене мати різні теорії та ідеї. Але я не буду розкривати це зараз.


Please help support and aid Ukraine

Я ненавиджу цю війну, і я ненавиджу те, що відбувається, але я просто хочу, щоб ця нісенітниця покінчила. Тому, будь ласка, якщо ви голодні, помираєте і хочете підтримати благородну справу,

I really must learn this language. But it takes a lot of studying. I will soon get there.



Injuries and Health

torn distal bicep


torn distal bicep

weightlifting accident

Growing up I always admired superheroes and athletes, “strong guys”, Or people with super inhuman powers that could defy the realities of life. All that said, I still found a poignant grip towards characters like the Punisher for example. A downtrodden mad motherfucker who is out for vengeance against the evils that have wronged him. All this to say that I have always focused myself on the human body and physical strength.

Discipline and focus were never anything that I understood or admired. For lack of a better word, I just was not giving a fuck about anything but being a kid and enjoying its pleasures.


So, I remember this scenario in my head when I was younger, and I was driving my mom’s van on a public street, out to get some pizza. Well, I didn’t use my blinker and I charged into the parking lot. When I got outside of my van 2 women approached me and harassed me about what I did. I don’t know what it was about that experience, but it made me feel small, insignificant, even. So, I started pacing around in my bedroom, and developed a plan.

In the beginning it was free weights and calisthenics. Nothing crazy, just simple things in the bedroom every day to make me feel better.

Pregablin for Anxiety treatment

I am writing today because my psychiatrist will not prescribe me Lyrica (pregablin) for my debilitating anxiety. Her reason for not prescribing me Pregablin as indicated by her interest in Medical Journals addressing Pregablin as a first line of medications for Anxiety disorders. I have listed references concerning this, and my findings are satisfactory if thoroughly investigated.

“Pregabalin lowered total Hamilton Rating Scale for Anxiety scores within 1 week and was effective against both somatic and psychic subcomponents.” –

“Available evidence suggests that pregabalin is effective and well tolerated in the treatment of GAD.” –

“Successful treatment of GAD with pregabalin versus placebo and active comparators has been reported in clinical trials.” – ttps://

Additionally I was suggested to try Gabapentin as opposed to Pregablin. Any significant research will determine Pregablin more effective in it’s Pharmacology. As Pregablin is absorbed, metabolized and distributed more effectively than Gabapentin.

Pregablin is the successor to Gabapentin and is more effective. Both drugs are indicated as primary usage for Neuropathic Pain. Both drugs are essentially the same.

In conclusion I wish to be prescribed Pregablin for my anxiety, as opposed to Gabapentin. If there can be any credibility otherwise, I wish for a more thorough explanation.

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